Then came Secondary School, where everyone went through puberty and 'politics' started. It was the time where everyone formed cliques, became critical, and started to become cautious and wary of the people we didn't want to be associated with. Sad to say, I was like that. Not that I was critical, but I took a deliberate effort to keep my guard up so that I wouldn't be hurt by unnecessary back-stabbing or gossiping. As such, I hung out with a close group of friends, who coincidentally were my classmates from Sports Class - A class that is knitted together with friendship, sports, and 4 years of fun.
My Junior College days were much more pathetic, because I missed the first three months of orientation and lessons. So imagine me having to adapt to a new school, with new friends (who already have their own cliques), and struggling to keep up with the lessons and curriculum. Boy it was tough! I guess the number of friends I had (friends that I can relate to and have a decent conversation of at least a certain depth) could be counted with my mere fingers. That was the time where I bottled everything up. No one seemed to understand. Everyone was partying, I felt lonely at times.
Now that I'm a young adult, that wall of defense still erects strong and high. Somehow, the friendliness I used to have seem to have evolved into a silent fear. I have become very conscious of what people think of me, and as a result, that seems be a binding fear when meet new people or make new friends. Thankfully, I have found some very good buddies that have proven their friendship in times of adversity and trials. These are the friends that will go the extra mile for me, support me when I am down, and stand by me through thick and thin. So I thank God for them, and I am sincerely honored to have such great buddies. :)
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