Grace Said.: The OCD Symptom

Over the years, I've developed some strange habits which I thought was pretty normal. For example, refusing to lean my elbows against the edge of the table when I eat, tidying up my room before I begin my revisions for exams, pack dear's room when I arrive at his place etc. You get the drift.

I've always thought that this peculiar quirk of always having to arrange things in a neat manner or having a high standard of hygiene was just a habit developed from my growing up years. Until one day, my friend said that I had OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), and it suddenly dawned upon me that hey, she might be right!

So I googled OCD signs and symptoms, and found the following:

What is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)?
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by uncontrollable, unwanted thoughts and repetitive, ritualized behaviors you feel compelled to perform. If you have OCD, you probably recognize that your obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors are irrational – but even so, you feel unable to resist them and break free.

Like a needle getting stuck on an old record, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) causes the brain to get stuck on a particular thought or urge. For example, you may check the stove twenty times to make sure it’s really turned off, you’re your hands until they’re scrubbed raw, or drive around for hours to make sure that the bump you heard while driving wasn’t a person you ran over.

Most people with obsessive-compulsive disorder fall into one of the following categories:
Washers are afraid of contamination. They usually have cleaning or hand-washing compulsions.
Checkers repeatedly check things (oven turned off, door locked, etc.) that they associate with harm or danger.
Doubters and sinners are afraid that if everything isn’t perfect or done just right something terrible will happen or they will be punished.
Counters and arrangers are obsessed with order and symmetry. They may have superstitions about certain numbers, colors, or arrangements.
Hoarders fear that something bad will happen if they throw anything away. They compulsively hoard things that they don’t need or use.

(Source taken from here)

I almost flipped when I read the above article, because I really think I am a Counter / Arranger and a Washer! I am serious!

All this while, I have an incessant need to place things in a neat and organized manner, failing which, I will get irritable, and arrange things all over again. When I am go different places, I have this fear of getting dirty, hence I always choose clean eateries, or clean toilets. Otherwise, I'll wipe the table or chair with a tissue, or refuse to answer the call of nature until a proper restroom with clean sanitation is found.

I know it sounds really absurd but I embarrassingly admit to the above.

But good thing dear doesn't really mind (I think). Well, I did try to educate him to not lean his elbows against the tables but I've given up hope. Other than that, we seem to still work pretty well despite this OCD problem. That's because I like to arrange and clean things while he relaxes (trying to be politically correct here), so we are a great team!

Fortunately, this OCD of mine isn't so serious that I have to seek medical treatment, or psychological help. Phew!

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