Grace Said.: Tolerance & Forgiveness

Being caught in the love web for a significant period time, I would expect that my level of tolerance would have increased in a much greater measure. After all, I've persevered, endured and tolerated what I thought was the worst period of our journey - his army days. Back then, I was faced with a grouchy, dissatisfied, bored, disinterested man and I significantly remembered crying a lot. Even so, I continued to hope, believe and hang on until his army days ended and well, things became much better and smooth sailing for us.

But surprisingly, I find myself to be more intolerant now as compared to 6 years ago. I asked myself "Have I changed? Have I become more bitter and more irritable?"

And as I go through the possible answers to this rhetorical question at the back of head, it dawned upon me that perhaps, I have been more unforgiving rather than tolerating. Simply put, I might have been as equally tolerating, but I might not have been more forgiving as compared to before.

You might think that it makes no difference, but actually it does.

If I am more forgiving, I would not have to tolerate more because the basis of my forgiveness is based on understanding. On the other hand, if I tolerate more than being forgiving, I will probably end up erupting in fury one day because tolerance has a limit.

So in my opinion, forgiving is much more healthier than tolerance because once forgiveness is acted out, we understand, release all kinds of bitterness, anger and doubt, and ultimately move on.

Well, that's just my 2 cents worth of how forgiveness plays an integral part of a relationship. At least I have come to understand this through many incidents of self-implosion due to recent incidents.

That said, I am still in the process of rekindling the forgiving part of me because I have come to realize that tolerance can be really painful in the long run.

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